Thu 2 May 2013
Lotus flower
Posted by PJ under bearing witness, caregiving, mom, my poetry, poetry
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Hot off the presses. I fear I am repeating myself, but I only have One Great Subject these days,
Lotus flower
Always so decisive, organized and resolute, never-aging,
confident-acting if not confident, a bubbly, outgoing woman.
Most of that is gone now. Now, I find myself with a little girl,
uncertain in her steps, both physical and of the spirit,
still reaching out to be what she was, who she was,
but finding a maze of walls between her and her self.
A great tenderness crests inside me, longing to protect,
to make her feel good about herself amidst the torment
and the tumbled-down world she tries to stumble through—
even when I’m exhausted, when the frustration is high.
I cannot swear to always being a perfect person. I weaken.
I trip and fall, but the soft lotus blooming in my heart
is a good resting place, holding us both above water.
The child I chose not to have found me anyway.
What can I do except love her and mother her?
