Better Than Dead

I feel you.

Random quote of the day:

“One writes out of one thing only—one’s own experience. Everything depends on how relentlessly one forces from this experience the last drop, sweet or bitter, it can possibly give. This is the only real concern of the artist, to recreate out of the disorder of life that order which is art.”

—James Baldwin, “Autobiographical Notes,” Collected Essays

 

 

Disclaimer:  The views expressed in this random quote of the day do not necessarily reflect the views of the poster, her immediate family, Siegfried and Roy, Leonard Maltin, or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. They do, however, sometimes reflect the views of the Cottingley Fairies.

This journey is actually split into two parts: the first, a short discussion of this book:

and maybe a little bit about this one, as well:

Kathleen Bartholomew, the sister of sff writer Kage Baker, has been carrying on Kage’s legacy since Ms. Baker’s untimely death. She has put together collections of Kage’s stories, done the finishing touches on manuscripts left behind, and has been completing books begun by Kage. Subterranean Press has been publishing them. Kathleen’s wonderful blog chronicles in touching and lively detail the life she and her sister lived together, but also talks about the writers’ life, life in general, the Faire circuit, and spooky travels on California’s I-5. It’s a great loving stew of many flavors and exotic ingredients. Kathleen is a talented writer, often lyrical and moving, and her blog really is a delicious treat. I cannot recommend it highly enough.

Now, as to the second part of this journey. Not quite as lyrical and moving, but I never promised these posts about journeying around my room would be. In fact, one might even call the next part of our story a sordid journey into family politics. If one was a Drama Queen. I’ll leave it to you as to how to label it.

(more…)

Random quote of the day:

“Make sex precious and you make it dangerous.”

—Graham Joyce, Requiem

 

 

Disclaimer:  The views expressed in this random quote of the day do not necessarily reflect the views of the poster, her immediate family, Siegfried and Roy, Leonard Maltin, or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. They do, however, sometimes reflect the views of the Cottingley Fairies.

Random quote of the day:

“You never know what is enough unless you know what is more than enough.”

—William Blake, “Proverbs of Hell,” The Marriage of Heaven and Hell

 

Disclaimer:  The views expressed in this random quote of the day do not necessarily reflect the views of the poster, her immediate family, Siegfried and Roy, Leonard Maltin, or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. They do, however, sometimes reflect the views of the Cottingley Fairies.

Random quote of the day:

“The chief deficiency I see in the skeptical movement is its polarization: Us vs. Them—the sense that we have a monopoly on the truth; that those other people who believe in all these stupid doctrines are  morons; that if you’re sensible, you’ll listen to us; and if not, to hell with you. This is nonconstructive. It does not get our message across. It condemns us to permanent minority status. Whereas, an approach that from the beginning acknowledges the human roots of pseudoscience and superstition, that recognizes that society has arranged things so that skepticism is not well taught, might be much more widely accepted.”

—Carl Sagan, “Wonder and Skepticism,” Skeptical Enquirer, Vol. 19, Iss. 1, Jan-Feb 95

 

 

Disclaimer:  The views expressed in this random quote of the day do not necessarily reflect the views of the poster, her immediate family, Siegfried and Roy, Leonard Maltin, or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. They do, however, sometimes reflect the views of the Cottingley Fairies.

I’ve been trying to dig myself out of the mounds of acquired stuff that have begun to seem more a burden than preserved treasures. Part of this has been cleaning up and getting rid of old paper files and odds n’ ends in filing cabinets and boxes. Sometimes I actually throw them away; sometimes I digitize them then throw them away. Other times I run across relics of my past that aren’t really worthy of preservation—except, maybe, as personal historical documents. Signs and portents from a much younger me which now and then have messages for the present.

I came across one of those today, something written on a scrap of paper when I was about fourteen or fifteen. There was some scribbling in imitation of a novel called Jesus Christs by A. J. Langguth that made a big impression on me back then. Not great writing on my part, but I find it as hard to be disdainful of that child who was me as I would find it impossible to be disdainful of any fourteen or fifteen-year-old child trying to find their way in the creative world. I will digitize this page, even though it isn’t “worthy.”

We need to protect our young selves because they still exist inside us, still need to be nurtured and told it’s okay to come out of hiding. They are part of us, no matter how we may deny them or what sophisticated masks overlay their faces.

On the bottom of this same preserved page was another message, scrawled in a different pen and in obvious distress—not the fat, rounded characters of my “artistic” handwriting.

Why am I so cruel and impatient? He’s old and needs help. He needs someone to listen to his stories and make him feel good.

That one sent a chill through me. That young girl was speaking of her biological father, already a senior citizen when she was born. What chilled me? It made me realize that my life has been bracketed by the care and consideration of two old people. When I was young, my father—much older than my mother, and now, of course, as the wheel turns round and round…it’s my mother.

In between these brackets existed a time for me, a precious and fleeting time, but I didn’t realize that. I piffled it away, had some fun, worried too much about inconsequential things, thinking my time infinite and solely my own. I don’t believe I’m alone in this kind of behavior, this illusion, as many a human seems incapable of grasping the passage of time. I have done a lot of gazing in crystal balls in the course of my life, consulting with the tarot and the runes and the lines in the palm of my hand. I got quite good at telling fortunes. I could really sell it, you know? Weave a good story for the marks…

Like many and many a fortune, my own held good and bad, steady going and crumbling steps, the expected and unexpected—none of which, really, was picked up by the crystal or the cards or the lines or the runes. Like many and many a future, mine held a large dose of irony that oracles seem very poor at ferreting out of the aethyr.

Random quote of the day:

 

“There are some people who live in a dream world, and there are some who face reality; and then there are those who turn one into the other.”

—attributed to Douglas Everett

 

Disclaimer:  The views expressed in this random quote of the day do not necessarily reflect the views of the poster, her immediate family, Siegfried and Roy, Leonard Maltin, or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. They do, however, sometimes reflect the views of the Cottingley Fairies.

2 Jul
A literal rat race: two competitors chasing each other across the eaves of the porch. Rats endemic to most L.A. neighborhoods, even nice 1s.

27 Jun
There’s a research assistant here that sounds uncannily like Tobey Maguire. I want to say, “Spidey, is that you?”

25 Jun
The sleek young mother in the park with the ponytail halfway down her back bouncing her toddler on her knee while he laughed and looked.

He looked quite dapper in his navy and gray striped jumpsuit. I don’t know why I assumed he was male, I just did.

24 Jun
If a cat barfs in an out of the way place that no one will see or step on, do you still have to clean it up? A purely rhetorical question.

23 Jun
I used to have an encyclopedic memory & now it’s complete dreck. Ou sont les nieges downtown?

23 Jun
Life is what teaches you about your soul. Trying to withdraw from it only teaches you about the echo chamber inside.

10 Jun
The irony is not lost on me: my bookmark for The Yiddish Policemen’s Union is my CWA membership card.

I haven’t been union for years but am proud I once was.

9 Jun
Never meet the eye of the little old lady in the cat food aisle unless you want a half hour conversation about her poobers. 1/2

I expect to be that lady someday soon but for now I’m keeping my head down.

8 Jun
I’d sing “Hope I die before I get old” but it’s too late for that.

7 Jun
Global warming is a fact, but I sometimes think even scientists occasionally fall prey to millennialism. Millennialism is also a fact.

7 Jun
So, are “scientific” predictions of the end to be taken more seriously than loony Mayan predictions?

Jun6
The middle-aged woman at the vet’s office with so much collagen she could barely speak.

Random quote of the day:

 

“Healthy discontent is the prelude to progress.”

—Mohandas Gandhi, Young India, Volume 11

 

 

Disclaimer:  The views expressed in this random quote of the day do not necessarily reflect the views of the poster, her immediate family, Siegfried and Roy, Leonard Maltin, or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. They do, however, sometimes reflect the views of the Cottingley Fairies.