Better Than Dead

I’ve taken the week off from writing due to bad attitude. My attitude has improved mightily. I’m still going to take the week off from writing. The Universe has reinforced this decision by sending me a rejection this week on a story that’s been out for months.

‘Course, the message could just as likely be, “Get back to work.” Good thing I don’t believe in Cosmic Messages.

Except, of course, when I do.

Blood Geek was supposed to be a quick and dirty edit because My-God-I’ve-Edited-This-So-Much-Already-What-Could-Be-Wrong? But there’s that old Samuel Johnson quote, “The prospect of hanging concentrates the mind wonderfully.” I’ve found the same to be true when I get close to actually releasing a piece of my writing to the world. I cannot see releasing something that I didn’t do my best job on.

So…I’m going to have to rewrite several chapters of Blood Geek because the voice is just wrong, wrong, wrong, and I’m going to have to rewrite a couple of other chapters from the ground up in order to make the heroine protag instead of thinking about protagging. I just can’t see any other way of getting around that. I’ve tried tinkering with the material that’s there countless times and it just doesn’t work.

I have examined my mind, my heart, my spirit to see if this is just a perfectionist delaying tactic, but I honestly don’t think it is. Whether anyone looks at this book or not, it’s still going to be out there. Why would I want it to be out there if it wasn’t the best book I could make it?

The rest of it reads pretty well to me. Decent escapist fare. So I’m going to take a week off, gird my loins, and get back to the dirty work next week.

I’m dying to write something new, itching for it, and I know just what novel I want to work on next. It’s been plumping in my mind for weeks now while I work on other things.

All of which is a good thing, except I can’t work on anything new because I’ve got to finish revisions on Blood Geek first. Then there’s the question of when to finish the next round of revisions on Venus in Transit. I wasn’t entirely happy with it when I got through with that last hard slog. I’m not talking about perfectionism here. I’ve long since given that up. I’m talking about having a workable draft, something I can polish and start sending out.

Yet if I diddle around too long with old ideas, I’m afraid the new idea will die on the vine. It might anyway, because as I’ve said before, my writing time is extremely limited these days. I’m determined to chip out time every day, but weekends have become very difficult, and mostly the default has become my lunch hour at work. That’s always been somewhat sacrosanct, but last week, even that got eroded away. I had to run errands at lunch every day last week. It made me despair a little. Or more.

But this week I’m back on track with my revisions and feeling generally better about a lot of things. I think Venus will have to wait, though she’s notoriously impatient. I really do believe I need to balance the old with the new, the revisions with the creation. Carmina has been talking to me consistently lately: low whispers while I sleep, a sudden bright snatch of song as the sun dapples the leaves while I’m driving to work, shared shadowy confidences while I move down a hallway and turn a corner.

She’s there. She’s waiting for me to be ready for her. I really think I have to follow her lead.

This one is making the rounds, so I thought I’d chirp up.

Lincoln’s Dreams by Connie Willis. All I have to do is remember its final line and my heart fills with emotion.

To Say Nothing of the Dog by Connie Willis. A comic masterpiece.

Kage Baker. Everything. Her combination of humor and sorrow, darkness and light fit my worldview perfectly, and her characters are like old friends (and enemies). If I had to choose just one…I couldn’t. But I did love her first Company novel, In the Garden of Iden and The Anvil of the World beyond distraction.

Andre Norton. A seminal influence on me. I loved her Witch World series from early days.

The Iron Duke by Meljean Brook. I love her Guardian series, too, but this one is so much fun, the characters so engaging, the world so deeply realized and brought to life, that it was an utter pleasure from first to last.

Dead Until Dark by Charlaine Harris. The Sookie Stackhouse books are so very much better than that tatty TV series.

Moon Called by Patricia Briggs. The first Mercy Thompson book. Gotta love a character with the last name of Thompson, but in the case of this series, I think Ms. Briggs creates wonderful characters and moves them through a logical and consistent alternate contemporary world.

Black Ships by Jo Graham. Wonderfully rich and well drawn historical fantasy that lives inside you. First of the Numinous World series.

Unholy Ghosts by Stacia Kane. Dark, lovely, well-written, well-imagined futuristic urban fantasy.

The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova. A massive recent-past historical fantasy, but riveting from the first page. A scholarly thriller.

Damiano by R. A. MacAvoy. This historical fantasy trilogy (Damiano, Damiano’s Lute and Raphael) is one of the most amazing and moving I’ve ever read. She’s an incredible writer. I’ve loved everything I ever read by her. I just wish she was still writing.

The Outback Stars by Sandra McDonald. The first book in a great sf trilogy: the Australian space Navy, a touching love story, Dreamtime mythology made real.

Ilona Gordon – Ilona and her husband write together. Their Kate Daniels series is consistently interesting and fun. Slightly in the future, semi-dystopian, urban fantasy.

Sunshine by Robin McKinley – Another slightly in the future, semi-dystopian book, with a breathless narrator you will either hate or love. I adored her.

Working for the Devil by Lilith Saintcrow – First book in a five part series. High octane, futuristic urban fantasy.

A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle. Another seminal work.

The J. D. Robb Eve Dallas series. These are more police procedurals, but I’m including them because they’re set in the mid-21st century. They’re my ultimate comfort read!

I know I’m going to kick myself, be chagrined, and otherwise embarrassed for forgetting someone essential. I’ll add ETAs as needed.

Random quote of the day:

“Those who toll the bell to announce the end of the novel should be asked to reflect on that verse by the poet John Donne: Aren’t they tolling the bell on their own ability to write novels?”

—Javier Reverte

(Thanks to mount_oregano for this quote.)

Disclaimer: The views expressed in this random quote of the day do not necessarily reflect the views of the poster, her immediate family, Siegfried and Roy, Leonard Maltin, or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. They do, however, sometimes reflect the views of the Cottingley Fairies.

I spent a lot of time on the phone yesterday with the Verizon Wireless helpline. The computer had a hard time processing the idea that 1) I was ordering a phone for my mother but 2) I wanted the bill sent to me and 3) I didn’t want the new number to replace my current number. She was a nice lady and during downtime while computer got on with things, we chatted. I found out she was a painter in her real life, she that I was a writer. She encouraged me to not worry about selling my novels to traditional publishers. Did I know that I could publish them myself as ebooks?

Yes, thank you, I said. I was investigating that possibility quite thoroughly, not to worry. We concluded our business (successfully) and parted friends. Of a completely temporary nature.

The thing is, I am considering doing my own ebook. The proponents of indie publishing make some good points. The opponents of indie publishing and those who favor traditional publishing (who are not necessarily the same people) also make some good points. It’s a long, hard slog to do it yourself. It can be expensive and a great drain on one’s writing time. I would much rather go with traditional publishing, frankly, and I am still pursuing that for my more recent work. But I have some older stuff that isn’t bad, that I still take pride in, and I’d like to get it out there. I haven’t fully committed to the idea of publishing my own ebook, but I am starting to slowly roll towards that cliff edge.

Don’t get me wrong: I have absolutely no expectation of making money this way. Money is not at all why I’m considering this. I am not looking at the success of Amanda Hocking and Stephanie McAfee and thinking, “Wow! That could be me!” I haven’t got a name or a pre-sold “brand,” I don’t have the time to do the kind of gonzo marketing ebooks require—not with a full-time job and being a part-time caretaker. I am not a poster girl for possible ebook success. I think I understand the cold, hard facts of that.

But I would like one or two of these older novels to be out there. I’d like at least a shot of finding some kind of audience for them, however miniscule. They deserve their shot while I’m actively pursuing my shot at traditional things with the other books.

I am willing to be talked into or out of this. Don’t assume I’m stupid or haven’t read excessively and obsessively about all the pros and cons of indie publishing, but I am completely open to discussion on this. I welcome input and would like to hear what people think.

You can comment here, or to actually check off answers in this poll, please visit my Livejournal blog.

I’m trying to get outside my own head here to see what other people might do given a certain set of circumstances. I know what I’ve written, but I can’t help thinking it needs a reality check. I seriously want to know what people might do in these situations.

No tweet puns in the immediate forecast.

I’m still awake, don’t know how. 25 Feb

On this date in 1808 Stendahl bragged in his diary about killing three hares, his “first quadrupeds.” 25 Feb

I was awake from 4:30 AM Fri to 12:30 AM Sat then slept ten hours. Torrential rain when I went to bed, bucolic sunshine upon waking. 26 Feb

I decided to celebrate the weather change with a massive sinus headache. Fun times. 26 Feb

Snow in the San Fernando Valley, first since the 1970s. More rain tonight and lows in 30s even here at the moderate beach. 26 Feb

I went to the garage to clear more boxes. Only got thru 2 before my nose and fingers froze. 26 Feb

Oh, now the weather guy tells me that wasn’t snow but graupel, small snow pellets in great quantity. 26 Feb

lilithsaintcrow True. RT @sblackmoore: If a character survives a book without losing something important you’re not trying hard enough. 28 Feb

Something to give some perspective. Beautiful progression: http://bit.ly/huotRo 28 Feb

pj_thompson @lilithsaintcrow re: characters losing something by the end of the book – Do you think that’s true of comedic novels as well? 28 Feb

When I was a kid I thought writers wrote the books in one shot all the way through and figured the plot out as they went along. 28 Feb

How did they know to plant clues and foreshadowing, I wondered? When I’m doing rewrites planting clues I remember that and laugh. 28 Feb

Of course, I was right about them making it up as they went along…At least for the pantsers like myself. 28 Feb

Spent a few days adding new material to WIP when should be cutting but that new stuff will allow me to cut other stuff in the saggy middle. 28 Feb

lilithsaintcrow Lilith Saintcrow @pj_thompson Yes. Definitely. 28 Feb

pj_thompson PJ Thompson @lilithsaintcrow So that’s what I got wrong. :-)  28 Feb

lilithsaintcrow Lilith Saintcrow @pj_thompson Tragedy is easy. Comedy is much, much harder, because it skates that edge.  28 Feb

TrishaTelep Trisha Telep @lilithsaintcrow @pj_thompson That’s not funny! 28 Feb

lilithsaintcrow Lilith Saintcrow @TrishaTelep @pj_thompson *snork* 28 Feb

pj_thompson PJ Thompson @lilithsaintcrow @TrishaTelep Dying is easy, comedy is hard, but comedy don’t get no respect. 28 Feb

On the drive home I realized that the MCs in my comedic novel did lose something. Not body parts unless you count the holes in their hearts. 28 Feb

Yet if it hadn’t been for a good friend reading an early draft I would have skated over that exquisite pain. Thx, Kev. 28 Feb

These are arranged chronologically now.

Bouncing around from idea to idea bcs I’ve been so distracted. Maybe I should stop trying to write new for awhile and stick to revisions. 6 Feb

Good day, sunshine, currently 53 degrees here in Westchester. 6 Feb

Do not let me near your microwave. Burned 1 up last month and burned the mini quiches just now. 6 Feb

lilithsaintcrow Lilith Saintcrow RETWEETED by pj_thompson The best curse is, “May you live in interesting times.” The second best? “May you get exactly what you want…” 7 Feb

I’ve held off on revisions for the last WIP bcs there’s a central plot point that has to be changed and I haven’t had a clue how to fix it. 7 Feb

This morning I got an inkling on how to fix it, but I still have no idea how to get there from here. 7 Feb

Maybe I’ll just start driving and hope the road holds out, or magic flowers start growing by its side that whisper the right direction. 7 Feb

Spent the afternoon revising one thing and another. Being in that cold-eyed revision mode, I think I made good progress. 7 Feb

Eat now? The ginormous cranberry muffin I wolfed at 9:30 won’t hold me til 5, but def not hungry now. Just have to get hungry, I guess. 8 Feb

Ick. I just took a Promark poll and I feel so slimy. Prolly skewed their demographic way Leftie though. 8 Feb

JoshMalina Joshua Malina RETWEETED by pj_thompson “Gnomeo and Juliet” looks pretty cute, but Disney’s “Lawn Jockey Othello” strikes me as racist. 9 Feb

I feel zero envy for people who’ve lived privileged, sheltered lives. In fact, I feel kind of sorry for them: they miss the nuances. 9 Feb

I do, however, resent the hell out of them telling other people how they should live their lives. 9 Feb

Word nerd! @pj_thompson scored 522 in The Times #WordNerd test. Discover your score at: http://thetim.es/word-nerd 9 Feb

You, Madam, are a douchebag. I’m so glad I don’t work for you, but I hate having to listen to you deal with the people who do. 10 Feb

The current novel, The Numberless Stars, may be doomed in today’s market.  (The story of my life.)  I seem to be writing a female POV picaresque fantasy novel, and I don’t believe there’s any tolerance for that sort of thing in today’s instant gratification climate.

Of course, at this stage of the game the novel sucks (it’s a barely there first draft), so perhaps it isn’t a valid test of the viability of the picaresque, fantasy or otherwise.  It’s too twee, too infodumpy, too lacking in immediate and identifiable conflict.  Maybe the fault, dear Brutus, is not with the genre but with myself, my execution of said genre.  A story which wanders hither and yon and uses satire to point out a society’s flaws may indeed have some place in today’s world, but a wandering story which doesn’t engage the reader in some fashion early on is just a badly written novel.

Lord knows my first drafts take way too long to get to the point.  I spend enormous amounts of time getting the feel of the characters just so and have an unfortunate tendency to throw it all on the page.  My rewrites consist of paring down and refining, taking out gallons of character and tangential lard and boiling it down to make candles. And that’s for the novels that aren’t picaresque.  God save me if I actually write a novel where wandering around and having episodic adventures and living by one’s wit is built into the genre.

Because even if the conflict is there on the first page, it’s rather broad and cyclical:

• Hortensia versus the Western Society of her time.
• Hortensia versus her family.
• Hortensia versus deity, leading to transformation.

Then cycling back to:

• Hortensia versus her family, and finally,
• Hortensia versus the Western Society of her time.

God help us all.

Random quote of the day:

“I like novels to be about my betters, in body, wit, energy, breeding, or bank balance.”

—W. H. Auden, quoted in “Notable and Quotable: W. H. Auden,” Merriam-Webster Newsletter, February 2007

Disclaimer:  The views expressed in this random quote of the day do not necessarily reflect the views of the poster, her immediate family, Siegfried and Roy, Leonard Maltin, or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. They do, however, sometimes reflect the views of the Cottingley Fairies.